[Verse][Morrissey Style][Melancholy]
Oh, the factory gates are shut, the ovens cold and bare
A hollow echo where once sweet crumbs filled the air
The Hobnob, oh the Hobnoble, a titan of the tea-time fray
Now just a ghost in dusty tins, fading day by day.

[Chorus][Baritone Vocals][Dramatic]
And they say it's just a biscuit, a trivial thing, you see
But in its oaty heart, it held our history
A dunkable icon, a comfort in the gloom
Now lost to the void, like flowers in a lonely tomb.

[Verse][Slightly Pompous]
Remember queuing at the shop, the rustle of the pack?
The satisfying crunch, there's no turning back.
Each crumb a tiny soldier, standing firm and tall
Now scattered by the winds of change, beyond recall.

[Chorus][Baritone Vocals][Dramatic]
And they say it's just a biscuit, a trivial thing, you see
But in its oaty heart, it held our history
A dunkable icon, a comfort in the gloom
Now lost to the void, like flowers in a lonely tomb.

[Bridge][Spoken Word][Despairing]
They replaced it with some... airy confection, some insipid, sugared lie.
Is this the future, then? This blandness reaching for the sky?
Where is the grit? The honest flavour? The robustness we once knew?
Mascara runs like melted chocolate, for a biscuit lost, it's true.

[Outro][Fading Vocals][Whispered]
Hobnob... Hobnob... gone...
The nation weeps... on.
[End]